If PRWE Formed a Hockey Team~

As some of you may know I'm a bit of a hockey fanatic.
Using hockey positions as a template I got to thinking who would play what position if we formed a team if they played at all.

Barring penalties there are six skaters per side at any given time.

On offense you have a center. Somewhat of a "quarterback" but allowed to roam much more freely. Unlike football hockey moves constantly so impromptu plays happen often.
On either side of a center you have a left wing and a right wing.

Backing it up are two defensemen of course although they, as well as the wingers, are allowed to roam the ice wherever they want.

Finally we have the goalie. The final line of defense.

Now, other than the goalie you will see players at more than one position. It is allowed and practiced.

So having set that up and having an obvious "right" and "left" I thought it would be fun to put the members here on a team.

I'm starting at left wing and since it's my thread I'm the coach and captain too. Deal with it.

I need a good right winger. Arizona Jack gets the nod. Communication is important in hockey and although we're on different sides we have been known to accomplish that.

My center is a no brainer. StuJoe is getting a lot of ice time for sure. Centers set things up and work both sides as needed. A cool head helps as well.

Second line of forwards features DeOrc at left wing. Logical choice IMHO but unfortunately he's a ref too. Good luck there buddy!

Going to put Lehigh as second line right wing. I need to see some improvement in your play though.

Second line center is a BIG surprise. None other than Craiga!
Talks a lot of trash for a center but works both sides and besides we need a center.

Third line offense? Well we have none unfortunately. They are in the stands either on the left or right.
On the left we have Moen. He's about 33 rows up eating some popcorn.

TomC is in nosebleed territory. With binoculours he can see a few other members if he looks at the crowd.

Those would be right wingers. He spots Vess and jth on occasion. They don't have very good seats either.
Occasionally they are seen sitting by David in nosebleed territory.

We actually have another center but he spends a lot of time in the penalty box.
Oh that Peter T. Davis is an instigator! One of those guys that goads you into a fight if you fall for it and so many do.
He doesn't really care though as he owns the team.

Now, as in so many other sports, defense wins hockey games. So who's on defense?

Sadly I can't think of one. We have no defense and no goalie. We'll never win a game.

Kinda scary.

 

lol I don't know much about hockey but that was pretty good.

 

I demand to be the goal minder lol

 

You only need one player, Tomclown. The other team will instantly recognize that he has special needs and let him win.

Does that get me into the penalty box, I heard they have vodka in there.

 

I could do it but with no defense it will be a miserable experience.

 

Can we have Casino Sluts as our cheerleaders?

 

There's no sympathy in hockey. It's a team sport.

 

I can allways emulate Lord Byron or my other hero Tony Esposito LOL

 

Don't need them. I've been in touch with this group.

 

It would take a hell of a lot of emulating.

Actually got Tony O's autograph when I was kid along with a few others.

Some brothers named Bobby and Dennis Hull and another guy named Stan Mikita.

 

Nah never heard of them (officialy hate you LOL)

 

The hockey team would fail, I'm sure. Poor management, fan apathy...the fights are the only thing that would keep folks attention.
Clembo would be "that guy" at every sporting event, you know the one...comes to only a few of the games, really doesn't have a knowledge of the sport but acts like the expert. he poses as the teams #1 fan while all the while booing & acting disgusted, just trying to get attention. We have a guy like that here locally. We call him the "Mad Stomper" for his childish antics.
I never really cared for hockey much, I guess growing up in the South we played more football. Now that's a real sport!

 

Don't be sore cuz you didn't make the team. I already said they'd never win a game.

 

I didn't make the team? Oh darn. I have to confess, I didn't read your entire dissertation to see how your novel ended. I figured, knowing you, you would have said something you found hilarious like putting me on the bench or something. Maybe if I have an extra hour or so I'll go back and read your entire post....if I can stay awake trhough it, that is.

 

An hour? Evelyn Wood, you are not.

 

A team is only as good as its coach. With this liberal management it should come as no surprise we have no defense or goalie. Your strongest defense is sitting in the nosebleeds.
Hey………. let Tomc play goalie, just put a picture of Bush on the puck. lol

Does hockey have cheerleaders? If so Moen should be moved to head up that team of young college girls…no it wouldn’t help the team but he could have one of those big bullhorns and have a whole crew to intimidate.

 

This thread was fun(a rarity here) until sour grapes got into it. Nice try clembo.

 

Let's see here David I quoted your original post which was this.

Apparently you were not happy with the fact that you didn't make the team so you went back and edited your original post adding these words of wisdom.

Sure David. I'm that guy. Hell, I only played hockey for about 20 years after all. I played defense as a matter of fact. What would I know about the game compared to an expert like yourself?
Been watching the Blackhawks since the days of Bobby Hull and Stan Mikita. Hawks won the Stanley Cup last year. First time since 1961 the year before I was born. Yeah, I'm that guy. No knowledge of the sport.

Now get this. I'm a Bears fan too. Yes, I watch football which is another team sport. Been watching them lose all my life but did see ONE Superbowl victory.

THEN I see this brilliant statement.

You posted this ten minutes after you edited your other post. You know, the one where I don't know anything about the game. The post wasn't that long David. Perhaps one of your kids could have read it to you.

Now THIS made me laugh.

If my thread was a novel why did you even bother? Is this how you read everything?

 

Hey Clembo,

I am a Bears fan also. Sadly, this will be the last week this season that we have a winning team.

 

Congratulations jth. You have proven why you would be a nosebleed.
You are showing me nothing but attack. This is not how one plays defense.

FYI there are cheerleaders in hockey. Perhaps you should read the entire thread.