"Reverend Mosnar?" <ReverendMosn4r@gmail.c0m> wrote in message news:ef5ie3h64bdacnuj41rtd24da9mc9og4n9@4ax.com... > > Last night was my first ever league bowling night, and, coincidentally, > the first time I've bowled 10 pin in more than a few decades. I mention > the latter for the reason that drunken duck pin bowling really doesn't > count as "practice" .... > > New ball in hand (read:bag), and armed (ha! get it?) in stylish new > shoes, I enter the bowling alley filled with excitement and anticipation > of the night's festivities. My first stop? To seek assistance from a > resident dowager on the proper incantations to divine the proper lane I > shall bond with my fellow league-mates. This done with appropriate > mewling tone, I sally forth! > > For the purposes of my education and general well-being, I decline the > thought of sustaining frothy beverage. Opting instead to fully examine > and absorb the wiley techniques and tidbits of edification handed to me > by Teh Hunni(tm) and other league-mates. Said infusion of information > proved indeed beneficial as no lane dispute skirmishes you have heard so > much about in the local tabloids blossomed. > > Procedures such as: the squaring of the shoulders, the four-step > approach, and the "happy ending" were pored over in great detail and > regurgitated with much flourish. > > At the end of the evening, I held my head high in the knowledge that I > had risen to the call of duty and conquered the denizens therein. As I > exited the edifice, Teh Hunni(tm) at my arm, grown men were witnessed > cowering in the scant, thin shadows, wives and widows spread rose petals > in my path, and several children of indeterminate lineage laid claim to > my seed; all having been just informed of the newcomer's soul crushing > high score of 126. What a guy.. > > -- > mhm27x22 > Reverend Mosnar? > > A beer, a chocolate, and a sneak peek at Jesus.
On Sat, 27 Oct 2007 23:50:31 -0400, "Shirley" <bigd1999@bellsoutj.net> wrote in <JFTUi.11020$a9.8464@bignews5.bellsouth.net>: > >"Reverend Mosnar" <ReverendMosn4r@gmail.c0m> wrote in message >news:ef5ie3h64bdacnuj41rtd24da9mc9og4n9@4ax.com... >> >> Last night was my first ever league bowling night, and, coincidentally, >> the first time I've bowled 10 pin in more than a few decades. I mention >> the latter for the reason that drunken duck pin bowling really doesn't >> count as "practice" .... >> >> New ball in hand (read:bag), and armed (ha! get it?) in stylish new >> shoes, I enter the bowling alley filled with excitement and anticipation >> of the night's festivities. My first stop? To seek assistance from a >> resident dowager on the proper incantations to divine the proper lane I >> shall bond with my fellow league-mates. This done with appropriate >> mewling tone, I sally forth! >> >> For the purposes of my education and general well-being, I decline the >> thought of sustaining frothy beverage. Opting instead to fully examine >> and absorb the wiley techniques and tidbits of edification handed to me >> by Teh Hunni(tm) and other league-mates. Said infusion of information >> proved indeed beneficial as no lane dispute skirmishes you have heard so >> much about in the local tabloids blossomed. >> >> Procedures such as: the squaring of the shoulders, the four-step >> approach, and the "happy ending" were pored over in great detail and >> regurgitated with much flourish. >> >> At the end of the evening, I held my head high in the knowledge that I >> had risen to the call of duty and conquered the denizens therein. As I >> exited the edifice, Teh Hunni(tm) at my arm, grown men were witnessed >> cowering in the scant, thin shadows, wives and widows spread rose petals >> in my path, and several children of indeterminate lineage laid claim to >> my seed; all having been just informed of the newcomer's soul crushing >> high score of 126. > >What a guy.. <muffled guffaws> Now I don't feel so bad about my high score. ~and~ I wanna join *HIS* League!!! These fuggers around here with their 280 averages are damned intimidating - feh, even the geriatric leaguers hold a minimum 160 *average*.
"Sharon B" <sharon@lart.com> wrote in message news:fg219h$f3r$1@blackhelicopter.databasix.com... > On Sat, 27 Oct 2007 23:50:31 -0400, "Shirley" <bigd1999@bellsoutj.net> > wrote in <JFTUi.11020$a9.8464@bignews5.bellsouth.net>: > >> >>"Reverend Mosnar?" <ReverendMosn4r@gmail.c0m> wrote in message >>news:ef5ie3h64bdacnuj41rtd24da9mc9og4n9@4ax.com... >>> >>> Last night was my first ever league bowling night, and, coincidentally, >>> the first time I've bowled 10 pin in more than a few decades. I mention >>> the latter for the reason that drunken duck pin bowling really doesn't >>> count as "practice" .... >>> >>> New ball in hand (read:bag), and armed (ha! get it?) in stylish new >>> shoes, I enter the bowling alley filled with excitement and anticipation >>> of the night's festivities. My first stop? To seek assistance from a >>> resident dowager on the proper incantations to divine the proper lane I >>> shall bond with my fellow league-mates. This done with appropriate >>> mewling tone, I sally forth! >>> >>> For the purposes of my education and general well-being, I decline the >>> thought of sustaining frothy beverage. Opting instead to fully examine >>> and absorb the wiley techniques and tidbits of edification handed to me >>> by Teh Hunni(tm) and other league-mates. Said infusion of information >>> proved indeed beneficial as no lane dispute skirmishes you have heard so >>> much about in the local tabloids blossomed. >>> >>> Procedures such as: the squaring of the shoulders, the four-step >>> approach, and the "happy ending" were pored over in great detail and >>> regurgitated with much flourish. >>> >>> At the end of the evening, I held my head high in the knowledge that I >>> had risen to the call of duty and conquered the denizens therein. As I >>> exited the edifice, Teh Hunni(tm) at my arm, grown men were witnessed >>> cowering in the scant, thin shadows, wives and widows spread rose petals >>> in my path, and several children of indeterminate lineage laid claim to >>> my seed; all having been just informed of the newcomer's soul crushing >>> high score of 126. >> >>What a guy.. > > <muffled guffaws> > > Now I don't feel so bad about my high score. > ~and~ > I wanna join *HIS* League!!! > > These fuggers around here with their 280 averages are damned > intimidating - feh, even the geriatric leaguers hold a minimum 160 > *average*. If I could have gotten scored for gutter balls I would have made a fine bowler.
On Sun, 28 Oct 2007 12:48:07 -0400, "Shirley" <bigd1999@bellsoutj.net> wrote in <K23Vi.40394$b9.4136@bignews1.bellsouth.net>: [...] >If I could have gotten scored for gutter balls I would have made a fine >bowler. I am quite sure that all you would've needed was a beer and a little practice. The trick is to get them to bounce /out/ of the gutter and take out the back row.
"Sharon B" <sharon@lart.com> wrote in message news:fg2gum$jj3$1@blackhelicopter.databasix.com... > On Sun, 28 Oct 2007 12:48:07 -0400, "Shirley" <bigd1999@bellsoutj.net> > wrote in <K23Vi.40394$b9.4136@bignews1.bellsouth.net>: > > [...] >>If I could have gotten scored for gutter balls I would have made a fine >>bowler. > > I am quite sure that all you would've needed was a beer and a little > practice. Will *near beer* work? Alas, I am afraid my bowling days are over so I have settled for lobbing the ball at my grandkids and watching them scatter like ten pins. > > The trick is to get them to bounce /out/ of the gutter and take out > the back row. > The gutter balls that I threw would somehow stop in the gutter halfway down the alley. I would stand there embarrassed while they guy made his way down to retrieve it. I eventually became the groups cheerleader/mascot.
