Billie Clinton, exCreep! joke thread....

We haven't had one of these yet, and I know there are any number of good stories and jokes about this charaacter. I think it's time we revisited some to them, just to remind us of how much better off we are to day than back in the dark days of Demo. So here is my first contribution:

As Air Force One prepares to land, the captain makes his customary request over the loudspeaker: "Mr. President, would you please return the stewardess to the upright position and prepare to land?"

O.K. it's your turn.:kewl:

 

How many children's arms can Reagan's El Salvadorian goons cut off in a day?
Depends on how much of Reagan's cocaine they snorted.

 

Here is one everyone has heard. But I'll post it again anyway for Danr's pleasure.

A reporter asked Clinton one day. " Was Monica lying?" Clinton responded by saying. "No she was on her knees.:mouth:

 

Jokes aside, I liked Clinton. I couldn't have cared less about his sex life or his wife’s sex life. He was intelligent, a great speaker, and he knew how to lead a government. He was a real leader. If his biggest failing was that he gave into his carnal urges, I have to wonder how many men in the same position wouldn't have also let their judgment lapse. He tarnished his own memory with his own hand(s) but that's his problem.
No one died. No allies were angry with us. Our international credibility wasn't at an all time low. We weren't mired in another Viet Nam style protracted conflict. We didn't have record federal debt. We had no major terrorist attacks with thousands dead.
We had one sex scandal and one out of control republican sponsored special prosecutor that spent millions in a failing effort to disgrace a sitting president for political reasons alone. In the end, Clinton disgraced himself.
I can't even count the number of scandals and incompetent actions the Bush administration and Republicans in general are involved with today. If we had a democratically controlled congress, our government would have ceased to functions years ago under the weight of all the investigations that are currently being swept under the rug by the irresponsible and corrupt Republicans in congress today. If you, as a Republican, can feel good about this, you have a stronger stomach that I. Maybe the best thing for you to do, or the only thing you can do, is to make jokes about the last democratic president so that your choice doesn’t look so devastatingly horrific. Well, good luck with that!

 

Thank god for short memories! Guess it must make you feel better so please try and remember a few of these facts. Who was 'Vince Fauster' found dead on the white house lawn? Who killed him (actually) and what kind of investigation was conducted, and by whom?
As for Allies being angry with us. Why should they have been angry, they were playing us like a fiddle. Clinton gave in to every one of their wishes and demands. Without exception. Everyone loves a sucker and he was one! If he had been an ordianry citizen he would have to be listed as a public sex offender and have his picture posted in every post office.
What about white water and the so called Arkansas maffia, with the number of dead business partners and associated the Clintons left behind in their home state. The good people of Little Rock Ar. make fun of the rest of us for voting into office one of their biggest crooks in history.
It's all history so you can forget it if you like, but don't expect me or any other deceent person to cut him any slack. But then that is your problem, isn't it?encil:

 

The Spelling Bee... Dan Quayle, Frank Gifford and Bill Clinton were in a spelling contest. Unbelievably, Dan Quayle won! He was the only one of the three who knew that 'harass' was one word.

 

Q: Why does Hillary want to have sex with Bill every day at 5 am?
A: She wants to make sure that she is the first lady.

 

ok dan some of those are a bit funny

 

ChinagateSorry but this is no joke)
Communist China funneled money to the Clinton campaign and influence elections in 1996. Charlie Trie, one of Bills trusted DNC fundraisers, attempted to funnel this money. When faced with indictment he fled to China for refuge. Another money funneler for the communists and Clinton campaign, Johnny Chung, is now in jail. The funds came from divisions of the Chinese army, one of which had been caught only months earlier while attempting to smuggle AK-47's to LA street gangs. This is the government of RED CHINA - definitely a serious matter. Amidst the sex scandals another DNC fundraiser scandal, Johnny Chung, openly admitted to knowingly taking funds from the Chinese government. Chung also testified that the DNC knew the source of this money was communist China. They accepted it anyway. The money is said to have been funneled through Chinese government official Liu Chao-ying then Chung and then to the DNC. Even more revealing was that Liu Chao-ying, daughter of Liu Hauqing (recent head of the Chinese military and top official of the Chinese communist party) and a Peoples Liberation Army and Chinese space agency official, attended a DNC fundraiser. Here she was photographed with Clinton. Chung also visited the White House over 45 times. Chung took several thousand dollars from commies and contributed them to a partisan candidate for President of the United States and leader of the free world. Chung was only a powerful campaign contributer/supporter with ties to the DNC and White House. Johnny Chung testified under oath to Congress on his admitted relations with the Chinese Commies and the ties to the President. Ironically Chung is one of a very small number of people who had greater White House access than Monica Lewinsky! Chung is said to have made over 50 visits compared to Monica's 39! Even better, only a week later Charlie Trie entered a guilty plea for his fundraising crimes and agreed to talk with investigators! Who next? Well it happened to be John Huang! Huang, another Clinton cronie, pled guilty to funneling Chinese funds less than a week after Trie! Well, at least we know the commies endorsed Bill Clinton for president.

 

That is so incredibly unimportant compared to the LEAST of Bush's crimes. Bush LIED US INTO A WAR

 

Bill is filling out papers like usual and one of his advisors come up to him and ask, "Mr. President, what should I do with this abortion bill?

he replies, "just pay it."

 

Just anothe example of a fine upstanding Democratic President:

Vince Fostergate:
Soon after Clinton lawyer Vince Foster committed suicide under mysterious circumstances, his office was cleared out. Along with his office went the Whitewater billing records and several key pieces of evidence. Evidence suggests that Clinton associate Bernard Nussbaum purposely delayed access to the office to investigators. Not to mention the mysterious suicide in which there is some hint that evidence was tampered with. Witnesses have testified they saw Clinton aides clearing the supposedly sealed office.

I wonder where those whitewater billing records came from:
Years after they had disappeared from Vince fosters office, subpoenaed Whitewater billing records appeared in the White House. In January of 1996 an aide stumbled across them sitting on a table in the White House. They couldn't have been sitting their all these years unnoticed. Hillary's finger prints were on them.

 

One liner Funny oh ya, real funny for a Dem who wants to call Bush a liar !!

I never had sex with that women !!

Danr Bush did not lie us into war ,, Saddam lied us into war !!! You just dont get it do you ?

The simple fact is that Bill clinton is the one who should have (as the leader you purport him to be ) who should have went into Iraq and kicked butt,, you see the intelligence community at the time of Clintons presidency knew that Saddam was killing Kurds in his country with chemical weapons this is a fact Danr the mass graves are there to prove it !!!, that He had a substantial nuclear weapons program, that He was torturing His own people , that the Iradis were oppressed by a brutal dictator and His sons.

But being the savvy politicial that Clinton was,, instead we the american people were over taxed to the tune of trillions of dollars(where do you think the budget surplus came from?) Bill Clinton sat on his butt getting you know what in the oval office, and then when caught, He LIED to each and everyone of us !!

Seems funny that you have all this sympathy for the Iraqis now where were you then ? Danr
Seems that your morally outraged at the thought of a lie from President Bush, but where was that moral outrage then Danr?

Get consistent or your own integrity will become the question !!!

Rick

 

When I read things of this nature and knowing that the same Sultan already brought the former British Empire ports I think about Darwin's survival of the fittest and wonder if brains give out to greed.

 

Good question Peter, I'm glad you ask. Here is how I see it.
DWI is not "buying the American ports" as I see frequently misrepresented in articles about this in the MSM. American ports cannot be bought.

They are buying the port operating division of a London-based, British-owned Peninsular and Oriental Steam Navigation Co. That purchase will include current contracts that P&O ports has with the various ports listed in the stories. There are other port operation companies out there. The port in New York or any of the other ports mentioned could choose to contract with some other company if they do not want DWI being responsible for operating terminals in these ports. It is understand that the same employees who work for P&O currently will still be the employees that work there after the purchase goes through.

I don't think there are suddenly going to be Arabs running all over the ports. Anymore so than there already are. Actually because of regulations and unions, more and more of ocean shipping, port operations and terminal operations in America are all ready being run by non-American companies.

 

Ok if they want to shut down our ports all they have to do is not pay the workers.
Ok if they want something to come into or out of the nation they just have to make a phone call.
People tend to think of their hundred thousand dollar bonuses more then what they may be agreeing to.
Just look what happened to Time Warner and now Fox news when the Saudi billions got involved.
When was the last time you saw anything bad about the Saudi's, only the Iranians who are shia and persian.
But all in all I hope that you are right and I am wrong its just that I think it is crazy what is happening.

 

Man you have been manipulated beyond belief. Some day you will shake your head and ask, did I really think that.

 

And they accuse us of having short memories.

 

Excuse me Moen, but who are you comparing yourself with? Just trying to figure out what you and who ever "us" is may be refering to.